Okay well, here it goes. During the past days, I ’m currently occupied with the current situation of someone I know about breaking up.
Being there myself a long time ago, I would say that I do have a little fair share coming from my own experience and a little too much based on the experience of some people within my circle of what to do and what would happen if so on and so forth.
The process of moving on from a bad relationship is really hard at the beginning. This is where you have to start from scratch, the most difficult part, trying to collect yourself. Trying to regain back the confidence plus the resentment, and all the ill feelings you were harboring from being the one who was left behind.
We put a lot of ourselves into the relationships, that is why the process of moving on from an ex can feel like taking an eternity.
Figuring out that you’re truly and completely over your ex could be tricky but just like any ended relationship, the stage of getting over the loss won’t last forever.
And here, I’ve compiled few signs that you are completely over them:
1. DONE REFLECTION
The huge part of the healing process is mostly reflection and reminiscing of the past. You’re done thinking about what went wrong, what could have happened with all the if’s. If you’ve come up with the answer as to why the relationship didn’t work out, then you might be totally over them.
2. GETTING BACK IS NEVER AN OPTION
You’ve reached the stage after a long time of re-evaluating, re-calculating, going backs to your situation and you realized that you are not compatible in so many ways and you are better off without each other.
3. THEY ARE NO LONGER THE TOPIC OF CONVERSATION
If you keep on talking to your friends about the failed relationship, your past memories, the places you’ve been to, the food you usually eat, your favorite spots and the likes, chances are, you are still caught in the past and not completely over yet. But if they are no longer the subject of your conversation, then again, you might be totally over them.
4. HAVING A CLEAR MIND AND INNER PEACE.
You no longer dwell in misery. You no longer wait for their call. You no longer hoped to cross their path again by chance just so to rekindle the relationship. Thinking about them doesn’t give you pain anymore. No more defense mechanisms. No more enumerating all their shortcomings and wrong doings in order for you to justify the breakup just to lessen the pain they caused you and moved on forcibly. You have a bright, sunny clear day!
5. YOU’RE BACK TO YOUR OLD SELF AGAIN!
When you’ve come to your senses and back to your old self again, doing the things that usually interest you, hanging out with old friends again, even hanging out with common friends of your ex without being consumed by their thoughts, and you could say with all confidence that you are back on track, having a clear set of priorities and goals, ready to mingle, ready to move forward, then finally you moved on!
6. YOU DONT STALK THEM ON SOCIAL MEDIA ANYMORE.
You no longer stalk them on social media trying to find out some clues whether they are dating again, their whereabouts, if they are happy, you no longer care about what they are doing and what they are up to. You honestly don’t care anymore. All the more, you sincerely wished them luck and happiness just like you wish yourself the same thing.
7. YOU STOPPED KEEPING ALL MEMORABILIA.
And yes, you’ve thrown away or donated all their clothes, burned all their stuff, memorabilia, gifts, letters, deleted all your pictures together and everything that reminds them with a cheerful heart. No regrets. No going back.
8. HATE IS NOT THE OPPOSITE OF LOVE, INDIFFERENCE IS.
Lastly, you never think or say or wish any more ill feelings and bad thoughts about them. You’ve totally got over it. It honestly feels like they never existed. No hard feelings. You may occasionally think of the bad things they did, but not affected anymore. No pain. You felt indifference. Disgusted to be exact. Waste of time. Or rather, no feelings at all. Bland and emotionless. Just like that. No other emotions but just a plain disgust.
If you genuinely feel all of the above, well then, Congratulations, you totally moved on!
NEW LIFE. NEW BEGINNINGS. A BETTER AND UPGRADED YOU.